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This Amuses Me

111 Male Characters Of British Literature, In Order Of Bangability

Eomer is number 16. *G*

Aragorn is number 2, Legolas 45. However, Tom Bombadil is 21, Severus Snape is 33 and ASLAN IS 32?!

Who the bloody fuck thinks about banging Aslan?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Also, Othello is 35 (that seems like a bad plan), Will Ladislaw is 84 (really?), Sirius Black is 26 (somehow I would have thought he'd get a little higher, but okay) Peter Pan is 68 (is that even legal?!), and Mr. Rochester is number 1 (and Darcy is close at 3).

I was getting really worked up about this and then I reminded myself that I'm getting worked up over pretend people.

Also, I really want an American lit list now. (Joscelin Verrai is number 1 forevs.)


( 25 comments — Add your .02 )
May. 4th, 2011 04:28 pm (UTC)
Forget Aslan for a moment - as creepy as that is. Who think's about banging Frankenstein's Monster? Honestly, *that* is just... I have no words.
May. 4th, 2011 04:32 pm (UTC)
FWIW the literary Frankenstein is all literate and Byronic.

And okay he's a bit Romantic, but it was 1831 and they were into that!
May. 4th, 2011 06:45 pm (UTC)
yes, but how many people these days have actually read the book and are imagining the movie version of the monster? That's what scares me most.
May. 4th, 2011 06:53 pm (UTC)

Well considering apparently some people are into PETER PAN I think I might be comforted if they are thinking movies, because that means someone wants to do an adult woman pretending to be an adolescent boy rather than an actual adolescent boy.

...This way lies madness. clearly.
May. 4th, 2011 05:22 pm (UTC)
I saw that list yesterday and ... yeah. Aslan? Really??

Also, out of Shakespeare's entire canon - Othello (okay), Romeo (dumb but cute), and FALSTAFF??? Where's Prince Hal? Where's Hamlet? Where's Benedick? Pfft.

(I'm glad Rochester made #1 though.)
May. 4th, 2011 06:34 pm (UTC)

And I can't imagine Romeo on anyone's list. He was on about one girl in the morning and onto another by night! PFFT. Not hot!

And Falstaff? Ewww.
May. 4th, 2011 07:02 pm (UTC)

I dunno. The boy has some good lines. If he weren't seventeen or whatever, I'd just bang him once, then ditch him.
May. 4th, 2011 05:41 pm (UTC)
I think the icon says it all ...

May. 4th, 2011 06:32 pm (UTC)
lol, nice! ;)
May. 4th, 2011 06:43 pm (UTC)
How is Legolas behind Tom Bombadil? IDEK.

And yeah, Aslan? Really?
May. 4th, 2011 07:06 pm (UTC)
IDK, I'd pick Bombadil over the Elf. All that power and mystery tucked behind a clowning facade...

Aslan, though. Meep. *shudders*
May. 4th, 2011 07:07 pm (UTC)
And Faramir and Boromir weren't even on the list!! *is offended on their behalves*
May. 4th, 2011 07:37 pm (UTC)
May. 4th, 2011 07:17 pm (UTC)
And Sherlock Holmes? I'm sorry,but I as much as I'd prefer to believe otherwise (H/W slash), don't think anyone gets to hit that.
May. 4th, 2011 07:21 pm (UTC)
May. 4th, 2011 07:38 pm (UTC)
Aslan? Srsly?
I think part of my brain just broke.
May. 4th, 2011 09:46 pm (UTC)
I knoooooooooooooooooow! I don't understaaaaaaaaaaand!!
May. 4th, 2011 09:42 pm (UTC)
You just reminded me of my great and undying love for Mr. Darcy :D

Also congrats on getting all your PhD and tenure stuff arranged. I'm very long distance excited about your brilliant academic career!
May. 4th, 2011 09:45 pm (UTC)
EEEE! Thank you, bb! *dances about with you*

BTW how's your academic!au coming? *chinhands*
(Deleted comment)
May. 5th, 2011 12:56 am (UTC)
Also King Lear? He's old AND a dick! WTF?
May. 4th, 2011 11:28 pm (UTC)
Really? I can see Aslan if they mean in the form of the King or really I'd replace that with Willam or Harry. Or even in as some say god. But as a lion? that's a bit to much beast for me unless your talking Lora Leigh or Shelly Laurenston type lions.

And I just finshed reading Bummped the new teen version of the Handmaiden's Tale.

And How the Hell do you Beat Darcy! He's an empier of lit all on his own! There have been nearly twenty books about or with Darcy in them so far this year! I could keep the book store I work aflot on comics and Darcy books alone!
May. 5th, 2011 04:57 am (UTC)
where is the outrage that Mr. Darcy isn't 1??????????????????????????

:: looks around:: HELLO?????????????????????

so, i've trying to think of american lit but came up with nothing. One, cause I mostly read brit lit and two, what i have read of american lit tends to be postmodern. no male in postmodern literature is bangable. really.

but now i'm really gonna have to consider this :D
May. 5th, 2011 02:42 pm (UTC)
Does Manly from little house count? cause he was my first book crush I was still pissed at Gilber Blye.
May. 5th, 2011 08:50 pm (UTC)
Gilbert is Canadian, though...
May. 5th, 2011 08:49 pm (UTC)
Hey, I'm just happy my boy made it on there. *G*
( 25 comments — Add your .02 )

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