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I am a good girl!

I feel like I've backtracked on my Be a Better/Happier Person Resolve the past couple days for the obvious shittastic reasons, but today I woke up all determined and stuff. So I spent the day working on Xmassy things like the Demented Elf I am--well the Punk Rodgers Elf that I am. I was thinking maybe I should punkify my librarian's cardi? It's this god-awful ugly mustardy thing--nice and comfy but uglier than sin; my Mom got it for me from Brooks Brothers a few years ago on an inexplicable impulse or possibly the mistaken belief that I am an 84 year old man... Anyhow it's the sort of thing you wear when it's cold and there's paper-writing to do, and I was contemplating putting a shitload of safety pins along the sleeves or something to make it more Catherine-like. Of course I'd also like to make a tshirt that says "Don't fuck with librarians!" and then have the librarians bit X'd out and "Archivists!" written below it.

Yes I am weird.

I think I got on that tangent because I'm fixing to watch The Librarian: Quest for the Spear and just think I am way the hell cooler than Noah Wylie even if George Clooney never bought me a car (pity).

Anyhow I am fixing to go into my last week of classes for this semester, thank any power that's out there. I have no idea what the grades are in two of my classes and should be a B in the third unless Irish Bitch really wants to rip the shit out of my paper (she probably will. Fuckit, I don't care.).

I am trying to wheedle my Mom into a real Christmas tree this year but she just wants to do the by now traditional Charlie Brownesque bush we keep in the living room. You know what this means: blackmail. Dammit.

Okay I am going to conclude this self-involved post by listing the 22 degrees I'd have (like The Librarian) if only they offered degrees in things I like:

Advanced Buffyology
Intermediate Middle Earth
Shakespeare in Popular Culture
Feline Studies
Textuality and Meta-Narrative in Everything
Dystopian Literature
Political Science in Science Fiction
DVD Appreciation
Retail Therapy
The Use of Folklore in Anything by Neil Gaiman
The Abuse of Folklore by Disney
Matrix Studies (first film only)
Ancient History Trivia
Intermediate Kinky Sex
Computer Abuse
Comparative Film Studies
Brit Wit Appreciation
Overanalysis of Harry Potter
Overanalysis of Everything in General
People Watching
Gender Roles in Cult vs. Normal Television
General and Cult Television Criticism
Dragon Appreciation

Oops that's 23 isn't it...why yes I am kinda bored how could you tell? But boredom is better than stress... (I slept AGAIN last night!!)

"What makes you think you could be a librarian?"
"Well I've read a lot of books..." Heh sounds like me...
And it's bad when you watch a movie and sit there and criticize the reference interview...
And yay for gratuitous Shakespeare on TNT!

Okay I'll shut up for now.

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April 2018


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