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Stolen from gadgetorious:

Give me the title of a story I've never written, and your feedback telling me what you liked best about it, and I will tell you any or all of the following: the first sentence, the last sentence, the thing that made me want to write it, the biggest problem I had while writing it, why it almost never got posted, the scene that hit the cutting room floor but that I wish I'd been able to salvage, and possibly a short excerpt as well.

Comments

( 20 comments — Add your .02 )
tocourtdisaster
Jan. 21st, 2011 03:12 am (UTC)
My favorite bit of "Teen Girl's Idol of the Month" is definitely when Bones can't make it to Joanna's career day, so Jim goes instead and all the girls are swooning over him and blushing furiously when he sees all the magazine-side posters of himself that are plastered all over their notebooks. Joanna's reaction is pure perfection, too. :D
caitri
Jan. 21st, 2011 03:44 am (UTC)
Teen Girl's Idol of the Month
Yeah, that one was such a toughie to write because you know how I hate giving Jim a hard time. ;) And of course nailing Joanna's voice--at least until I figured out that if I thought of her as kind of a younger Ellen Page everything would work out fine.

This was my favorite bit:

"Where's your guitar?" one of the girls wants to know.

"Guitar?" Jim echoes blankly.

"He doesn't
actually carry it around with him, y'know," Jo says dryly.

"Thanks, Jo," Jim starts to say, but she continues.

"It's in his hovercar." Jo looks evil.

For the first time, Jim sees how Joanna McCoy is actually like her mother, and it scares the shit out of him.
tocourtdisaster
Jan. 21st, 2011 03:49 am (UTC)
Re: Teen Girl's Idol of the Month
Ooh, I love the idea of Joanna as a younger Ellen Page. Now I have someone to imagine when I write her. ;)

Also, that last line is awesomesauce. :D
caitri
Jan. 21st, 2011 03:54 am (UTC)
Re: Teen Girl's Idol of the Month
<333

Actually one of my WIPs languishing on my thumbdrive is a log!verse story ala Juno where Joanna is a pregnant teenager. I keep meaning to go back to it but keep getting distracted by other things... :/
tocourtdisaster
Jan. 21st, 2011 04:30 am (UTC)
Re: Teen Girl's Idol of the Month
Oh, god, I would LOVE to read that. I dream of being able to write dialogue as witty and real as what's in Juno.
gadgetorious
Jan. 21st, 2011 04:52 am (UTC)
Re: Teen Girl's Idol of the Month
"at least until I figured out that if I thought of her as kind of a younger Ellen Page everything would work out fine."

DID YOU NOW? And pray tell, HOW DID YOU FIGURE THIS OUT? Hmmmmmmm?

;P
caitri
Jan. 21st, 2011 04:55 am (UTC)
Re: Teen Girl's Idol of the Month
In the alternate universe where I wrote this story, alternate!evi was awesome? :D
szkoda
Jan. 21st, 2011 03:26 am (UTC)
I thought that your use of lolcats to illustrate Data's frustration in "Out, damn Spot!" was bizarrely original, which is tough to do with lolcats! That and when he mistakes the tribble for a hairball...those were some fun moments!
caitri
Jan. 21st, 2011 03:52 am (UTC)
Out, Damn Spot
Y'know, I really thought the tribble/hairball thing was pushing it, but something in me just said "go for it." And of course, this was what inspired the whole thing:

Data lolcat

It was really too bad I had to leave out the scene with Lore and the Klingon stuck with all those tribbles though, but I just could not find a way to make it work!!
gadgetorious
Jan. 21st, 2011 05:06 am (UTC)
Well, I have to say I was a little wary when you said you were writing a fic based on Dorothy Parker. But Nine Lives was brilliant. I loved the insight into Bones; how he can treat the symptoms but not the cause - Jim's curiosity that keeps getting him in trouble in the first place. "The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity." Indeed. How is Jim not dead like a hundred times over? ;)

[I'm just trying to make your life difficult.]
caitri
Jan. 21st, 2011 03:33 pm (UTC)
Yeah, and you know, I thought another 1930s-40s literary AU would just be overkill, but of course it was SUPPOSED to be this screwball comedy and it rapidly turned into something--else.

I think one of the hardest parts was resisting the urge to make all these Thin Man references with Spock, particularly when the boys go to Hollywood and there's that whole knock-off of The Little Foxes and all based off Jim's experiences in WW2, but then I got to thinking about it and all the flashbacks started to seem kind of Tarsus-ey, and then of course that meant that I got to do some serious research on PTSD for Bones. Poor Bones, having to deal with that, and poor Jim, so afraid of becoming an alcoholic like his Mom.

I had this really great scene planned for when they split up, based heavily on Parker's own experiences with Campbell, but you know me, I can't keep the boys apart for too, too long! ;)
gadgetorious
Jan. 21st, 2011 03:35 pm (UTC)
LMAO. That was... not what I expected but it really should have been. Our brains: so similar and yet so very different.

Where the hell is my excerpt? ;)
caitri
Jan. 21st, 2011 04:13 pm (UTC)
Leonard wrinkles his nose at the smell in the small apartment. The empty bottles. "We've gotta talk about this, Jim. You know that."

Jim is in a worn white undershirt, two days' worth of beard on his cheeks and his eyes bloodshot. There's a messy pile of paper next to his typewriter--the draft is coming along then, like Pavel said. "Fuck you care, Bones?" he slurs. "Told me yourself you can't take this shit anymore."

"The nightmares are back, aren't they." Jim flinches, and Leonard knows he's right. "Look, Jim, the booze--it's not gonna help, no matter how much you think it will."

"Least I can sleep. Sometimes. That's more I can say for some."

"Pike's different, you know that. Legs blown off in the Pacific. You're a whole man, at least, Jim."

Jim barks a bitter laugh. "You think? Not much to show for it, if so." He glares at the typewriter. "I can barely put words together these days, Bones."
joirerson
Jan. 22nd, 2011 03:15 am (UTC)
I hope I understand this meme! I really liked this story where Sulu taught David how to fence and lent him a copy of the count de Monte Cristo and Treasure Island, but then Jim got into Trouble with Carol because now he wants to be a historically accurate pirate for Halloween in two months and so when Carol got him back he was starting on his plan of not bathing except in seawater and with great reluctance. Plus Spock being a sekrit hippie parent with his and Nyota's child was illogical, yo.

See, from Common Grounds, no I did not encourage you to just write kid!fic what??? *looks nonchalant* Did I understand the meme, or was I supposed to pick something you had made noise about rather than giving an unsolicited prompt from Common Grounds? Inquiring minds want to know!
caitri
Jan. 22nd, 2011 10:56 pm (UTC)
LOL, you're sorta halfway there.Pretend you're commenting on a real story and say what you liked about it. I need a title, too. ;)
joirerson
Jan. 23rd, 2011 12:08 pm (UTC)
The count of Monte Crisco
So, as usual I loved it! I really enjoyed Sulu's characterization, and the David and Joanna interactions were priceless. Jim really is a nerd, isn't he?

I think I did it right this time?
caitri
Jan. 24th, 2011 12:30 am (UTC)
Re: The count of Monte Crisco
Yeah, Jim is a total nerd, which is of course why I love him! *G*

Of course this story was so hard to write because I had to show him being all fatherly with David, and get the emotions right, and try not to verge into out and out fluff too often. I had to cut out a ridiculous Guitar Hero scene for that reason.

I do think this was my favorite part though:

"Hikaru, dude. Seriously?" Jim crosses his arms and tries to not look as freaked out as he feels. He's got to be the adult and all. Oh God, I'm an adult. How wrong is that?

"They're okay, Jim!" Alice is up and on her feet, hurrying over. "I've been watching the whole time."

"Yeah, I just got a little--enthusiastic." David looks sheepish and apologetic, and something frozen melts within Jim in relief. "Sorry."

"It's okay, man, look." Hikaru bends the foil up so that Jim can see the protection bobs at the end. "Same thing we use every day on the team."

Jim exhales. "Yeah. Sorry, man. I should have known better. I just--I freaked out. Sorry."

Hikaru grins at him. "No worries, man. I get it."


Edited at 2011-01-24 12:30 am (UTC)
joirerson
Jan. 24th, 2011 02:47 am (UTC)
Re: The count of Monte Crisco
OMG GUITAR HERO I LOVES IT I think I need to go do a Mr. Burns hands for a while now.

AND YES JIM BEING A GOOD DAD. AND NERDY WITH HIS MR. NERDERSON GLASSES. I can just see him calling Bones a nerf herder.
caitri
Jan. 24th, 2011 02:48 am (UTC)
Re: The count of Monte Crisco
YES. And Jim would be all "I love you" and Bones would be all "I know." *G*G*G*
joirerson
Jan. 24th, 2011 02:53 am (UTC)
Re: The count of Monte Crisco
I'm all asquee!!!
( 20 comments — Add your .02 )

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